The Knickers

This will be my strangest post. Ever, I think. In the now seven years of blogging I have behind me, I have done a lot of things. One thing I haven’t done, though, is beg. So I’m about to.

You see, I am  a strange shape. Big hips, short legs and funny-not-long-rest of me. This presents a challenge when purchasing pants and, of course, underwear.

Underwear is a big thing in my world. It must be comfortable, it must cover my ass (I’m not a thong-fan, sorry for all the fantasy flames I’m dousing here…not :P) and it must, at least, be pretty. I am very much banned from wearing anything flesh-coloured or ‘grannified’.

It is a constant battle when purchasing underwear. I either end up having to compromise on pretty, for functionality. Or compromise on comfort for the pretty factor. Plainly, it sucks.

But, then, a few months ago, something happened. These arrived in my life.

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Dear Woolies, hear my plea.

Yes, I did just post underwear on my blog. This did just happen. Sheena will be so proud.

I picked them up at Woolworths. I bought one pair, fell utterly in love with them because I do not have to compromise on comfort or prettiness. I returned to my local Woolies the next day, and bought two more pairs. I thought to myself “I will not broke myself out on knickers…I will get more when it’s utterly necessary”.

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I love you dearly, Woolies. Even more so if you can find me these…

So, this was my plan.

About a week later and I had become nervous to wear any other knickers because, frankly, I just ended up feeling sad, uncomfortable or annoyed when not wearing these.

So I returned to my local store.

They were out of stock. I phoned around and…nothing.

So I checked the online store. These beauties are not listed.

Now, I realise that my plea is not charitable or of great need. But, it is important to me. Every human being will tell you that wearing uncomfortable undies has a significant impact on your day…right now, I’m having that day. All my little red pairs are in the wash, and I am wearing something rather uncomfortable.

Dear, darling, Woolies, please could you find me more pairs of these? Somewhere, in your mammoth stocks of things, surely you have some?

Size: Medium. The little code on the back of the tag reads: 11818/501634046.

I will pay happily for these. I will pay with a smile. I will sing and dance and leap for joy. Mostly because, I’ll be wearing these pretties when I leap.

Please, dear Woolies. Help a girl out.

**Update – Woolies sorted me out with a few new pairs within a week. WINNER. Woolies, you’re legendary. Thank you!*