this dream is a definitive sign that i need a holiday. or something

last night, i had the strangest dream.

I was warped, physically, into my inbox.

And there I was.

Surrounded by little email envelopes. All of them flapping their little flaps, and yelling at me for attention.

It was hell.

I heard a lot of voices. My director’s, my colleagues, some voices I did not recognise.

And there, in the back, was one email. standing alone. standing quietly.

And i thought, I’ll deal with that one first.

So I walk over to it, clamber past the yelling flaps and say:

Cath: Hi, I’m Cath. How can I help you?

Email: Hi, I’m spam. Would YOU like a bigger penis?

I woke up at this point. I’m still not sure whether to laugh, cry or book myself into the closest funny farm.