this will be my last post for today. And possibly beyond then. who really knows.
the truth is that I miss you. That the weekend ahead, laid bare with opportunity and openings and a single running thought of being alne in it. That thought is all that truly consumes me.
As i said to Will, there is just a veneer of skirt and smile that, scratched a little, as it was today by a friend, reveals a messy, gluten-free and sugar-absent bland beyond.
I am left wordless, again. Covering myself up with being busy with work, and forcing a smile towards the sunrise. it’s hard when I know you’re looking at it too.
There is no spark here, because i never dreamed i would have to lay down my torch for you like this.
I miss your smell and your style
And your pure abiding way
Miss your approach to life
And your body in my bed
Miss your take on anything
And the music you would play
Miss cracking up and wrestling
Our debriefs at end of day
These are the things that I miss
These are not times for the weak of heart
These are the days of raw despondence
And I never dreamed I would
have to lay down my torch for
you like this
I miss your neck and your gait
And your sharing what you write
Miss you walking through the front door
Documentaries in your hand
Miss travelling our travelling
And your fun and charming friends
Miss our Big Sur getaways
And to watch you love my dogs
These are the things that I miss
These are not times for the weak of heart
These are the days of raw despondence
And I never dreamed I would
have to lay down my torch for
you like this
One step one prayer
I soldier on
Simulating moving on
I miss your warmth and the thought
Of us bringing up our kids
And the part of you that walks with
your stick-tied handkerchief
These are the things that I miss
These are not times for the weak of heart
These are the days of raw despondence
And I never dreamed I would
have to lay down my torch for
you like this