The 5 Love Languages of Children | Book Review (and a giveaway)

Posted on May 19, 2014

I’ve always been a little skeptical of self-help books and courses. Granted, there was a time in my twenties when I was all about the self-help books but, much like Bridget Jones plunged her pile of books into the bin, so I (somewhere near my thirtieth birthday) packed all of them into a box. Yes, even “He’s just not that into you” (it may have had something to do with the fact that, when I was reading that, he was actually that into me. Haha).

 

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Anyway, I digress. Earlier this year, my kid had to do a set of worksheets that centred on figuring out her own Love Languages and those of her family . I really enjoyed the experience and it piqued my interest in the whole school of thought. Our individual quiz results that ascertained our particular love languages were pretty interesting – mostly because – as it turns out – my kid and I share the same primary love language.

That’s why I was thrilled when this book got delivered to me – The 5 Love Languages of Children. Since doing those quizzes, I’ve tried to remember my kid’s primary love language more and more when considering my parenting, and I’ve enjoyed keeping that perspective.

Penned by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell, The 5 Love Languages of Children focuses on applying the principles of love languages to your parenting and raising children in accordance with their primary love languages. It also includes nifty, short tips on how to deal with particular situations, in a supportive way that aligns with your children’s love languages.

The authors also cover a more-important-than-ever topic – discipline. As a parent, I’m known for being a helicopter-strict-mom (and am unashamedly so!) but I also believe in discipline, not punishment. What’s the difference? That’s easy – discipline, to me, is an act of love that seeks to train a child in the ways of life (and, yes that does include actions being linked to consequences). It is a way to teach, not to punish. I appreciated this book for its approach on discipline, especially in light of the love languages. This line struck home for me:

“Love looks out for the interests of others, so does discipline”.

There are also sections on “Learning and the Love Languages” and a very on-point section on “Speaking the Love Languages in Single Parent Families”.

As a parenting resource, I’d recommend this book a thousand times over. I enjoyed its exploration of applying children’s love languages in a variety of situations and I’m really quite glad I got to read this!

Thanks to the lovely Cherilyn Murphy for arranging me a copy of this great book to review! You can purchase the book here. 

And here comes the best part – I’ve got two copies of this fantastic book to give away to my lovely readers. To enter, simply leave a comment below, telling me what your favourite childhood memory is. Winners will be chosen from a hat by my kid and I’ll put up a video announcing the winners. Please note that this competition is open only to South African residents. Closing date for this competition is 26 May 2014.

This competition is now closed. The responses I received for this competition were so heartrending. Some made me grin, some made me sob! Thank you for sharing your precious childhood memories with me! 

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The winners are:

Stacey and FabulousMommy!

I’ll be in touch shortly via email to arrange

delivery of your prize!

 

46 thoughts on “The 5 Love Languages of Children | Book Review (and a giveaway)”

  1. Aged two I went with my mom and dad to fetch my baby sister from the Princess Alice Adoption Society. I can still see the moment as if it was yesterday – my father was holding Lindy in his arms and I reached up to give her a rattle that …. she scrunched up her face and let out a holler not unlike the ones she can give to this day! It set the tone for a roller coaster of a relationship ride that I am lucky enough to have with my infuriatingly wonderful and crazy sis

  3. My favourite childhood memory is probably from Christmas Eve when I was around 8. My mom was single, supporting my sister and I. We had very little money but she still made it so special by getting us to dress up and set the table. Decorating the tree was an occasion – one we looked forward to every year. She prepared the most delicious Christmas dinner, just for the three of us! I appreciate her effort in that moment so much.

  5. I grew up in a really small time in Namibia and I can say that all memories I have of it are good though it might have something to do with he ability to compartmentalize my memories and box up the bad ones but the memory that stands out the most is a rather simple one… before we moved to Namibia we lived all over SA and when I was 2 we were in Ladysmith and my parents owned a hotel. There was one kitchen lady/chef named Maggie and she always let me help in the kitchen and put me in charge of picking the vegetables for the salads 🙂

  6. Best Memory? Making “Jaffles” around the fire in our lounge on cold winter evenings. The trick is to use 3 slices of bread and to break a raw egg into the middle one which has been scooped out to act as a holder. Taste great!!

  7. One of my favourite memories is lying with my Dad every night and he would tickle my hand and always tell me to stop growing up. I never understood why he would say such a silly thing until I had my own son 🙂

  8. I have so very many wonderful memories of my childhood – family holidays, day trips to all kinds of museums, Christmas, Easter, train trips, road trips, my parents attending my school concerts…
    My favourite one might have to be my 10th birthday party. My parents organised my first ever slumber party and set a snazzy table with sugar-frosted glasses and made my favourite foods, and they waited on myself and my 5 sleepover friends all night! I felt so very special!
    My parents taught me by example that no matter what your circumstances, you can make happy memories.

  9. I have a lot of favourite and funny memories and a few that are a little…uh. Well. Moments that will be retold when my family isn’t around to stop me. THAT kind of story. On a lighter note, Our Family, used to walk around the block after supper sometimes. One night there was a crescent moon, and my brother (who must have been 6 or 7) looked up at it and stated that “God or the weatherman” must have taken a bite out of it. Still cracks me up to this day.

  10. I would love to read this! Fingers crossed. So many, but the one that comes to mind first – my dad and I used to watch Orkney Snork Nie together every Friday night (I was in my early teens) and after a good laugh we would chat about our week (and life). My dad worked away a lot when I was small, so those Friday nights were special bonding times.

  11. One of my enduring childhood memories is going adventuring on the farm with my Dad. The 3 dogs and I would pile on the back of the truck and we’d head off into the veld to check on the sheep or cattle. I remember the sun on my back, the wind in my face and the feeling of being absolutely free and ALIVE.

  12. My best childhood memory was my first day of school. My mom and dad took me and they were really impressed. I didnt cry. I felt so big with my new school dress and new brown school case. They dont make those any more. Its a fond memory because of the big fuss my parents made about it

  13. Ah! I remember those big brown suitcases! The aroma of them makes me feel like I’m 7 again. Thank you for sharing!

  17. “My parents taught me by example that no matter what your circumstances, you can make happy memories”

    And, heck, you made that into a life mantra. How beautiful! XXX

  20. Oh man, how fab! I love how what can seem like the most simple of tasks become our treasured memories from childhood!

  21. My favourite memory is of a 2 week period spent travelling with my mom. Being the middle child of 5 meant that there was not always alone time for us with our parents, but just before I turned 12 my mom and I flew to Egypt and the UK. Sitting on the back of a camel in the desert and my mom telling me to put this moment in my memory bank, really has made a lasting impression on me as a woman and a mom myself.

  23. Not sure if previous post went through: It is difficult to chose just one memory because being a parent and ‘reliving’ your childhood brings them all back. Recreating the magic of Christmases and birthdays is something I take very seriously. Story times, meal times and one on one times are things that meant a lot to me growing up and I am so enjoying watching Nate appreciate them too.

    PS I also enjoyed the Love Languages book (the adult version) – so helpful in understanding your spouse and family members close to you.

  25. I LOVE the love language books 🙂 Have the adult one and would absolutely love the kiddies one. My favourite childhood memory would be all the camping trips and hikes we went on. Before my mom got sick we went on so many outdoor adventures as a family and those times were so fun and so carefree. A time we were all able to be silly and forget the rest of the world. In those moments there were only the 4 of us and they were the BEST times. Xx

  27. Mine is of my 7th birthday – just two months before my dad passed away. My dad made wedding cakes and flowers as a hobby/business but my cakes (apart from my Christianing cake) has always been pretty but colorfull butter icing kiddies cakes.When he asked about my cake that year, I just said a book cake as reading was my favorite thing. He either read my mind or somehow knew (he was very sick) that he would never make my wedding cake. So he made this amazing giant book cake in white petty nice with sugar flowers and filigree and a photo of me. Like I always wanted. I cried when we cut the cake that day. As I have cried many tears for every big day he miss in my life

  28. Oh. Wow.

    Your dad was a special, special man. Is, still. What a precious, heartrending memory. Thank you for sharing X

  29. When I was little, somewhere between 18months and 2 years old, I had a dog called Hoover. My parents say he was just a regular labrador but in my memories he was a giant. I remember his soft fur and how he followed me everywhere. I remember how his ears felt like silk and how we’d cuddle up together to nap.

    I think he was my very first lesson in how to love somebody and how sometimes you find parts of your heart outside of your body.

  30. Ah what a beautiful memory! Kids need pets so much and I loved reading about your special Hoover. Was he named so because he ate everything? Heehee. Thank you for sharing 🙂

  32. My favorite memory is going to the beach when I was a child. I remember sitting in the sand with my little sand bucket and pouring mountains of sand on my dads feet while he fell asleep in a chair. He was always so funny.. and him carrying me on his shoulders while I wore floaties as he waited through the water to a sand bar. I remember my dad helping me build a turtle out of sand, so many people stopped to watch..

  33. One of my best memories, we used to live on a farm when i was growing up and everyday we used to take the animals for a walk – the dogs,cats, and our pig named Miss Piggy 🙂 iam sure if any one spotted us they would have had a good laugh

  37. Certainly my favourite memory from childhood was my first hunt. Yes, yes, I know… boys and all that. I grew up in the Eastern Cape on a sheep and cattle farm and when I was about 8 or so, my old man told me one evening that I was now old enough to shoot my first buck; I was so excited I could hardly sleep that night. In the freezing hours of early darkness the next morning, dad and I climbed into the bakkie and took a drive to the other side of the farm where all the game tended to hang out. Anyway, this story really has nothing to do with shooting anything, but everything to do with that special time you have with a parent, otherwise alone, walking through the veld feeling like a “grown up” and talking about grown up things. Those moments when you feel especially close to somebody, respected for your opinions and, for a fleeting second, a peer instead of a child.

    Now I’m tearing up, thinking about my boys, hoping that one day they’ll look back and think of me as a good dad. 🙂

  39. I was in Std 1 and on my birthday my dad bought out this brand new baby blue racer and the thing was bigger than me! My dad held onto the seat while I peddled to make sure that I didnt fall over and after a while I screamed at him to let go, I turned around and my dad was standing in the middle of the street with this amazingly huge smile on his face watching his baby girl ride on her big bike for the first time.

  41. My favourite childhood memory has to be lying on my gran’s chest and having her brushing my hair while telling me a story. I don’t know but that’s what always stand out for me when I think of my childhood.

    I try that with my 5 year old but it doesn’t have thay much impact cos these lil ones of today are too occupied with too many things.

  43. Doing the You crossword puzzle with my now late grandfather. I was only useful if there were any pop culture questions. He always used to moan at my penmanship. He was a grumpy old fart but I loved him so much.

  44. Doing crosswords and word puzzles. Gosh. You’ve brought back a memory for me – my folks used to do them every day, in the papers! Thank you for this 🙂

  45. One of my favourite memories is that of me lying on top of the rabbit hutch inside the giant cage my parents built for our rabbits and guinea pigs, day dreaming in the warm sunlight.

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