the truth is im livid.
so livid in fact, that this weekend i dug and ripped a tree out of my garden.
by it’s roots.
but, it’s okay. i clearly needed to do it, and the tree was going to be re-homed anyway.
i just didn’t think i had it in me. seriously. it worries me sometimes how much latent anger i really do have. sometimes i wish i could express it without hurting anyone or anything else. i know i have the right to be angry but, it serves noone for me to get angry. it wont serve me, or you, or anyone.
but then…
anger is just an extension of sadness.
so, i guess, im sad.
sad for a million reasons. mostly because i should’ve taken the advice of someone many, many years ago when they said:
leave. now. don’t ever look back. screw the sentiment and close your heart now.
“more than angry words I hate this silence. it’s getting so loud.”
You have been so in my thoughts C@th… I got your email, and I haven’t replied because I truly have no words…
I can’t tell you how many times I wished I had a punching bag in my flat to get rid of the pressure.