1. This song, today. I’ve been thinking alot about world events, because of a friend, who brings much to light. I’m keeping this song in my head alot at the moment, because it calms me. And reminds me.
2. Today is 19 months with my precious, wonderful Shmooshy. Lucky, lucky girl, I am.
3. I’ve been up since 2am. I’ve mentioned this previously. I watched my kid sleep. I do that a lot, I know. And one day, she’s going to wake up and shout at me for it. I hope not. But, for the moment, I love the quiet observance of watching my sacred blessing snooze. She kicks in her sleep, like I did as a child, and sprawls her way across the bed like it’s a land to be explored overnight. I was exactly the same as a child, and, apparently, I still am. She wraps herself within the covers, tightly, or throws them off sleepily, dependent on the heat or cold of the evening. That quiet observation, in a dim light, there is so much peace for me in those moments. Lucky, lucky mama, I am.
4. I’m trying very hard not to obsess as neurotically as done before. In a way, that’s quite a funny resolution – obsess over the need to not obsess over things as intensely as I always have. I like to think I’m just more aware of my tendency to be overly affected. I honestly envy unaffected people. People who can shrug off distemper, or carry on regardless, in the face of disappointment. Mentally, I feel like I’m training myself to get over things a little more easily. The littlest disappointments don’t pinch me as much. That’s progress for the little girl who still thinks she fat because someone she didn’t know said so when she was nine.